Strictly Speaking Week 12

Strictly Come DancingWe’re back to a lengthy show, so I’ll keep this brief. Here are my five gripes about an otherwise enjoyable semi-final…

  1. Why were the female celebs styled as little girls? Did anyone else find the overabundance of ribbons, cupcakes dresses, ponytails and ringlets uncomfortably cloying?
  2. Poor salsa. Please, producers, either drop it altogether or get some salsa pros on so we know what we’re actually aiming for – and/or use remotely appropriate music, rather than merging it with drunken disco.
  3. Much discussion on Twitter about tactical voting so as to avoid the judges forcing an unwanted result on us. How about we keep it simple and ditch the dance-off from the quarter-final onwards? POWER TO THE PEOPLE!
  4. Why oh why were we subjected to nauseating messages from random members of the public in all the VTs? I shall not comment on them further, other than to award Borrowed family prop points. And pray for the arrival of the Child Catcher.
  5. Finally, Darcey. Where to begin? It’s not that I mind you handing out random 10s (well, that’s a lie – did you know that whenever you use your 10 paddle, a fairy dies?), but if you’re going to pretend something’s perfect, DON’T POINT OUT A FLAW IN YOUR CRITIQUE. See: telling Natalie she was too careful in her salsa, agreeing Abbey had sickled feet in the American smooth lifts.

Best in Show

  • Best performance: Natalie’s Argentine tango Scored less than her clinical salsa, cause that’s just how those crazy judges roll, but as close as this pristine pair have come to dancing as a convincing couple, rather than two soloists who just happened to be on the same stage dancing the same steps OH HOW EMBARRASSING. Simmering intensity, technically assured.
  • Best costume: Sophie’s 1980s bridesmaid look Wonderfully dated electric-blue off-the-shoulder slashed dress and fountain ponytail. Here’s one we recycled earlier!
  • Best move: Anya’s Iveta tribute random leg lift/crotch flash Oh, Iveta. The world is so grey without you.
  • Best line: Len re: Sophie: “Her biggest competition is HERSELF.” Someone’s been in LA too long…

Read my full Dance Today blog here

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